Fathers Day

Father's Day for me is a lot like Missionary Farewells, they suck. My father died when I was six, and as a child I can remember actually being very uncomfortable on Fathers day. My friends would all tip toe around the subject thinking they could not talk about dads around me. If someone did not know me and asked about my dad I would feel like I had to apologize. I hated telling people that my dad had died. For some reason that was very difficult for me. Maybe because as a child you just want to fit in and since I had a name like Robbie Robbins and already stood out enough, it was just one more thing to make me "different".

Now of course I don't feel the embarrassment, just sad. I never really got to know my dad. I have blips of memories and fun times. I remember one day my brother 15 months older than me and I were taking a shower. We were in the stall and decided that it would be really cool to plug up the drain and have a swimming pool. We could not figure out why the water would not get any higher than the shower door. That is until our mom came in the bathroom and shrieked. I guess there was lots of water. We both got the wooden spoon for that one, except it broke on big brothers butt!

I can remember him horsing around with us quite a bit. As a child he got the name "Skin" because he was so skinny and he loved to tease. After he died and we would go to Texas to visit family all I had to do was smile and they knew who my dad was! I got his blue eyes as well as his huge gummy smile. Coming from a family of 10 kids he was always fun to be around and a hoot!

He was 32 when he died, and had four kids, and a very young wife.

This fathers day, like many past I will be reading his letters to his sisters. It is all we have that he ever wrote and they actually mention me. From this I have learned the value of journals. If my dad had kept a journal I would so love to read his words. Invaluable!

HAPPY FATHERS DAY

Fathers Day has good and bad feelings for me. Good because my kids have a great daddy and they all take good care of their dad on Fathers Day. Not so good because my dad died when I was six years old. My dad never kept a journal or anything so I get out two letters he wrote to his sisters where he mentioned me in one line of each letter!

Of course because of the value of those letters to me I have encouraged my hubby to keep a written history of his life and interactions with the kids. It is hard to believe that anyone will ever hang on every word you say, but it does happen.

When we get together with my brothers and mom we all like to hear stories and things my dad did. I like to hear things he said and did to kind of try and get to know him a little bit. I have few isolated memories of my own, but how would a scrap book or journal be? A good lesson.

In the meantime I wish a happy fathers day to all happy fathers out there. We all know a happy father is a great father!