Minimum Sentence

Although I try to keep the news about my son in jail on his blog I have to post this good news. Yesterday I flew into Arizona for his sentencing hearing. After two and a half years in county jail he has received the minimum sentence of five years. He can finally be transfered to prison and will have a little less than two years left to serve his time and price to society.

If anyone is unclear about how I feel about jails and prisons I will make it clear right here and now. I oppose all jails and prisons and feel they do nothing at all to rehab or help anyone anywhere. They are nothing more than schools to learn bad things and bad behaviors. I only pray my son can keep his great spirit through his prison experience and find good like minded individuals in the process.

There are not many people who can come out of the prison system better people than they go in, but I expect to see him do just that. In his two and half years so far he has read over a dozen classic books, as well as written a book and another to be published soon. If he can keep up this attitude in prison I will be so dang proud of that kid.

The only good part about yesterday, besides the minumum sentence of course, was the fact that I got to visit for over two hours with my son. We had a great talk and tried to take each other in since it will be a few months before I am able to talk to him again. He will be in transfer as well as the fact that we cannot talk on the phone or visit until we get approved after our background checks.

Stupidest system ever invented on earth!

PARENTS OF INMATES

Sometimes I feel as if I live two different lives. There is the life that I blog about on this site, but there is my other life that I blog about on my sons blog, www.realjailnews.blogspot.com. I do lots better when I just have to talk about the day to day events on my hotmoms site. That is the side of me that I wish I was still living all of the time.
Unfortunately there is the other life that I have to deal with on a daily basis. Being the mother of an inmate is not something I ever dreamed or should I say had nightmares about in my lifetime. You just never expect something like this to happen to your family.
In reading a couple of books that I have been reading lately I am realizing we will never go back to the old life we have lived in the past. As the book says we are living another kind of normal. Now our family vacations will be planned around Micahs' birthday and visiting with him wherever he may be incarcerated. We spent his 18th birthday visiting him through the glass of coconino county jail. This year we are already budgeting and planning for our month long trip to the U.S. to see Micah. We will be allowed special visiting time because we are from out of state. I am just so excited to be able to touch and hug him.
Sometimes when I think that my son has not had a kind touch for eight months it breaks my heart. Maybe it is the Mom in me and a little bit of the massage therapist and just a plain old person that realizes we all need touch. Sometimes I wonder if part of the reason they fight in prison so much is just to get someone to touch them, without worrying about the other weird side of things.
These and many other things go through my mind a hundred times a day. We do not know what will happen to Micah, or when but we continue praying and hoping for the best outcome for our son.
As well as try to keep our faith and survive this "different kind of normal".

DREADS

So if anyone ever tries to tell you that dread locks don't hurt, they are soooooo lying! I think only childbirth rivals the pain, and at least you have a baby to show after that, not just fried hair. I told Micah I was going to dread my hair and leave it that way until he was free. My "rage against the machine" so to speak.
I do hope he appreciates the pain I just went through. Not to mention the fact that my hubby laughs at me everytime he looks at me. I think it would be better if he just freaked out or something, but laughing?
We are going to the beach for a couple of days and when we get back I will post pictures. By the way though if anyone is contemplating a face lift, this works pretty well. You know when you were young and mom put your ponies in too tight? Well this is the same idea, so it pulls your face nice and tight, cheap facelift in Costa Rica!

LOVED

Have you ever noticed that God works through other people? That just when you think nobody understands you, you are reminded of His love for you from other people?

I had a particularly difficult weekend for a variety of reasons the biggest one being I had way too much time to think and surf prison blogs and forums! That is just like picking a scab and should be very much discouraged for people who are trying to be positive. It is just like a bad car wreck, you just keep checking out stories that make you feel better about your own story, but pretty soon you are crying for other moms going through the same thing, no fun!

Add to that the whole hormonal upheavel of pre-menopause, there Mom I finally admitted it :), and you have a bad case of the blues.

This morning one of our students showed up with flowers from his home stay mom. She and I are friends with a very limited vocab between us, but none the less friends. She had sent me this beautiful boquet.

A couple of hours later the mail man came with not one card but two from my best friend Karen in the U.S. Me and Karen go back to the age of 3 if you can believe it. She is in the process of coming to visit and was telling how excited she was and that if I ever needed anyone to talk to she is there. Isn't that cool? I just cried to think that God loved me so much to send me friends like this that listen to Him and watch over little ole' me!

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY FROM COSTA RICA

Happy Valentines day from Costa Rica! I thought these roses were beautiful, of course I think all flowers are beautiful, but these are especially beautiful. I think Valentines Day may hold the record around here for the most miscommunications.

My five year old was telling me yesterday all about how we were going to go out for dinner on Valentines. I told her just me and daddy were going out to dinner. She said "yeah but it is dia de amor, on the t.v. they show them going out to dinner". I explained that mommys and daddies and boyfriend and girlfriends go out to dinner. Kids just get little gifts and exchange gifts. She was bummed out for a little while but got over it when her big sister gave her a box of chocolates.

My 15 yr old did not say anything to her boy friend because she did not want him to feel bad about not having any money. So the past couple of days neither one of them said anything. Today they were talking on the phone and my daughter heard his mother say something in the background. He mumbled to Hannah, "feliz dia". Hannah said "que?" He mumbled it again and she just laughed.

Then the best one is my husband. I ordered him Godiva chocolates a couple of weeks ago. Well the problem with ordering from Aerocasillas is the fact they go through your package and write on the ticket what it is! So much for that surprise. He was still happy though and that is what matters.

I wish the best day ever to all and hope you get to enjoy it with someone you love. As my son in jail says, "I have to spend the day with dudes, dudes I don't even like !"

NICK VUJUCIC

I have had all day to digest and ponder the amazing and inspirational speech I witnessed this morning in San Jose. I really don't know how to talk or tell about it because it was so powerful and overwhelming at the same time.

Sorry the picture did not turn out better, but the lighting was awful so I had to time it during a break, or wait in a line for an hour after to get in a hug and a picture.

If I have ever used the excuse that I do not speak spanish to do anything here in Costa Rica, I need to repent and get on the ball. He did not speak spanish but had an interperter that did great. I'm sure it is hard to work up all that emotion and then wait for your turn to speak, but he did a great job.

In a nutshell Nick was born with no arms or legs. Two little feet, one bigger than the other that he calls his "chicken drumstick!" He calls it that because occasionally his dog tries to get it and he has to whack him with it.

If any of my kids ever makes an excuse for anything at all, I will trump that right down! There are no excuses for anything in this life! If Micah can write a book and blog while he is in jail, we know anything can be done!

WEEKLY SERMON

I found an awesome blog site yesterday and would highly recommend it to anybody who has, will or is adopting a child. It is A4everFamily.org. I learned a lot from it about some of Maleahs behaviors, as well as my reactions.

After raising six children you would like to think you have it somewhat figured out. Guess what, I just keep being amazed at how much I do not have figured out! Just when I think I have it figured out the rules change, or the kid changes, or the world changes, or I change! You get the idea, there are no rules, there are no constants except the values and principals we live by.

The real trick I guess is learning to apply our principals on every situation we run into with our children as well as ourselves. A good example of this is the belief I have that it really does matter who your friends are and who you hang out with.

My daughter is just starting to believe me on this one, but it is really difficult to learn. She would like to believe that as long as she is doing what she knows is ok it is all good. Unfortunately it is not like that anymore.

She has an older brother who is going to be in prison for at least five years because he did not believe this concept. He thought and actually still thinks that it is ok to go along with the group, as long as you don't "inhale" so to speak. Not true as he has very painfully been made aware of.

I guess this is my soap box for the week, and why I love blogging! I get to choose who I check out and who I hang out with! There are so many blogs and so little time. I have a great new word for friends who blog "frogs"!