Tuesday, March 10, 2009

CRAZY DIETS

I decided since I was now in training mode I should start a new diet in conjunction with crazy training. Hubby sent me the following one and I think I may try it, couldn't hurt ha:)

Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dogchow
for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line
when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
starting the Purina Diet again. I added I probably shouldn't because I ended up
in the hospital last time, but I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs
in both arms.I told her it was essentially a perfect diet and the way it works is to load
your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two everytime
you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and
Iwas going to try it again. (I have to mention here practically everyone
in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended
up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped
off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard. Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.Better watch what you ask retired people.. They have all the time in theworld to think of crazy things to say.

1 comment:

Rebekah Inestroza said...

That is the funniest story!!! So, now that you and dad are semi retired am I going to start hearing interesting stories like this?